Thursday, November 25, 2010

Funny words with double meanings

Here is a list of sentences using words with two meanings.
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THINGY
To a female a THINGY is any part under a car's hood.
To a male a THINGY is the strap fastener on a woman's bra.
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VULNERABLE
To a female being VULNERABLE is to fully open up one's self emotionally to another.
To a man being VULNERABLE is playing football without a cap.
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COMMUNICATION
To a female, COMMUNICATION is the open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
To a male COMMUNICATION is leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.
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COMMITMENT
To a female, COMMITMENT is a desire to get married and raise a family.
To a male, COMMITMENT is trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.
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ENTERTAINMENT
To a female, ENTERTAINMENT is a good movie, concert, play or book.
To a male, ENTERTAINMENT is anything that can be done while drinking beer.
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FLATULENCE
To a female, FLATULENCE is an embarassing byproduct of indigestion.
To a male, FLATULENCE is a source of entertainment, male bonding and self-expression.
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MAKING LOVE
To a female, MAKING LOVE is the greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
A male's definition of MAKING LOVE? "Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it."
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REMOTE CONTROL
To a female a REMOTE CONTROL is a device for changing from one TV channel to another.
To a male a REMOTE CONTROL is a device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.
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The bandage was wound around the wound.
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The farm was used to produce produce.
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The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
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We must polish the Polish furniture.
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He could lead if he would get the lead out.
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The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
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Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
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A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
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When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
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I did not object to the object.
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The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
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There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
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They were too close to the door to close it.
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The buck does funny things when the does are present.
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A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
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To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
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The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
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Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
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I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
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How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
allvoices

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