Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Christmas Cheers

Hi folks. Do you feel the Christmas spirit already? I want to pause for a moment from hard news. I want us to have a moment to smile about even for a brief moment. In the spirit of the season, here are some funny lines. I hope you like them. Merry Christmas!
What do monkeys sing at Christmas?
Jungle Bells, Jungle bells...!
What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree?

A pineapple!
Whats happens to you at Christmas?

Yule be happy!
How long does it take to burn a candle down?

About a wick!
What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
It's Christmas, Eve!
What does Father Christmas suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?

Santa Claustrophobia!
What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve?
Black mail!
Why does Father Christmas go down the chimney?

Because it soots him!
Mum, Can I have a dog for Christmas?
No you can have turkey like everyone else!
Who is never hungry at Christmas?

The turkey - he's always stuffed!
What bird has wings but cannot fly?

Roast turkey!
What's the best thing to put into a Christmas cake?

Your teeth!
We had grandma for Christmas dinner.

Really? We had turkey!
What happens if you eat the Christmas decorations?

You get tinsel-itus!
What do vampires put on their turkey at Christmas?

Knock Knock
Who's there?


Mary who?

Mary Christmas!
What did one Angel say to the other?
Halo there!
How do cats greet each other at Christmas?

"A furry merry Christmas & Happy mew year"!
What does Dracula write on his Christmas cards?

Best vicious of the season
What does Father Christmas write on his Christmas cards?

What happened when the snowgirl fell out with the snowboy?
She gave him the cold shoulder!
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
What do snowmen eat for lunch?

Where do snowmen go to dance?
What do you get if cross a snowman and a shark?

Frost bite!
How do you call an Eskimo cow?

An Eskimoooooo!

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